Board 8 RAP BATTLE: tha LEAGUE 2 Week 2
The Second Week of the Board 8 RAP BATTLE: tha LEAGUE 2 Tournament. ''~Week 2~ Battle 17: DSRage vs. TimJab ~The Score~ DSRage: 1 TimJab: 5 ~The Raps~ DSRage Uncover your eyes, uncover your ears I'm about to turn crazier than Britney Spears I want you to experience me and shed some tears Maybe out of laughter, maybe out of fear Enough about that, you suck so much I mean you suck so very very much You suck so much that you I can't touch If I touched you you would cry so much Are you scared of me yet, are you dead? I'm about to make the next move and shave my head And punch you in the face until it turns red this is my rebound rap, ***** TimJab i came in here to talk some shit, and ended up teachin you how to spit, get some flow dog, maybe quicken the pace, like a fed ex delivery of my fist to your face, it's always on time and the mail always goes through, time to find out what TJ can do for you, and what i'll do to you, if you ever step to me, i'll rip your shit open like a hysterectomy, your girl? she's havin sex with me, i'm sorry but it's true, she said your shit's played out like blink 182 if she ever liked you she must be eyeless, if she could see she'd know all you're packin is a stylus DSRage A small intermission- just what you need to recover from my punishment, you dumb weed I will pluck you from this earth since it has no need For a useless, ugly, over-populated weed. fuck shit shit- Is that all you can say? It's cause your mouth is full of it, mmkay? Don't teach me to spit, just try for yourself, Spit that shit outta your mouth, just spit it out! Nice reference to my name, that always works the crowd But the rest of the rap was simply you being loud. Don't tell me how to rap, bitch, I go my own way YOU should stop being mainstream, you dumb ***** TimJab first off did you listen to a word i said? i tried to help you now it's time to rip off your head, you rhymed need with weed and weed with need, you got no vocabulary mine inspires greed, ds it's time to concede, please don't breed, or i'd be forced to proceed and make your ugly children bleed, you cannot succeed, the whole crowd knows this, but ignorance is bliss, so keep on goin if you think you can rap, while the audience catches up on an afternoon nap, be-cuzzzzz after all they all know who's greater, you're tanner and i'm voiced by david hayter ---- Battle 18: AlecTrevelyan006 vs. Jukkie ~The Score~ AlecTrevelyan006: 6 Jukkie: 1 ~The Raps~ AlecTrevelyan006 Here comes a verbal duel, at dawn if you prefer You'll be playing Hamilton cuz I got dibbs on Burr I'm gonna be Ed Norton, deal your head a sick curb stomp Prepare yourself for failure, this battle's gonna be a romp Better place a bet in Vegas, cuz this battle is a lock As you see I am the master, you're the new kid on the block You're minor league forever, and you'll never make the bigs 'stead you fail in each attempt, like a rappin' Bay of Pigs So show me what you got, I'll even let you toe the mound First pitch I'll hit a homer that'll never touch the ground I'll beat you in this battle, then I'll take this tourney's crown They should call you "the syndrome", cuz you are going downs Jukkie I came to the show, I rocked it You cant stop my flow, I shock it This is the start of a lyrical jam-bo-ree I don't care what you think, nicca can't hang-with-me Cause you will fail this battle because I own You will never begin to beat me witha microphone I bust out nursery rhymes that leave you broken and alone Nick-nack-patty-wack give you mom my bone Father, I don't wanna leave these people too blessed Cause when I spit, most of em think I'm Po'-ssessed But I guess that you stressed, when I pop beats off the chest Don't jest with the best, cause I'm on a quest to put you to rest AlecTrevelyan006 I was rushed in my first verse, and to that I have confessed But it doesn't matter when my trough's above your crest No need to get all stressed, by you I'm not impressed You'll get crushed like a pest, up against this tourney's best I come off quite gregarious, but in truth I am nefarious I can crush you fifty ways cuz my methods are so various The thought that you'd compete should define the word hilarious Gonna get you on the run, Alexander to your Darius I don't know why you showed if that's all you can muster Are you buyin' yourself time with that putrid fillibuster? From the start you had no chance, up against this killa g But boy you disappointed, more than the new trilogy Jukkie Rushed on your first? More like busted. Clearly your worst, makes me disgusted. Your whole first verse, needs a huge adjustment. Rhymes so bad, you should reimburse the whole purse. This is my testament, Jukkie been pressed against a fad. Done the best I can to get next to it, before I go mad. Two thousand three will never be reborn, but don't ya mourn, Cause' one thing that will never die is Nope, Unicorns. Why waste your breath, nothing can be done Ya done, son, ain't no more fun, can't get by with a fast one What you begun, is for none, I can't be outrun, you weigh a ton Go tell ya loved one, or a nun, and if that don't work, ask BigPun ---- Battle 19: TheKnightOfNee vs. Ayvuir ~The Score~ TheKnightOfNee: 6 Ayvuir: 1 ~The Raps~ TheKnightOfNee Ready to get beat down, gonna take me on? Or will you flee town, like mister Aeon I beat you once, now watch the second time happen People love my rappin' like Palmer loves dappin' I'm not gonna stop your current streak of losin' You'll feel like Machop getting KOed by confusion After me, you've lost so much you'll have to buy a Garmin And you won't be able to wipe, even with the soft feel of Charmin Losing so much must be excruciatingly intense But not as sad as your hope-filled pretense Hope you liked this, next time you'll need doctors and nurses Now take my shit out of your mouth and lay down your verses Ayvuir People say my raps are shitty, they take pity Just cos i'm not from stereotypical rap ethinicity Well put down your guns, and lets have some fun This white boys gonna show you how its done! Don't run little Nee, but Aeon didn't flee, just got bored Your raps are simple and your rhymes should be ignored I applaud, for someone as bad as you beat yours truly The voters, like your sisters, are totally unruly. My aim is to get a vote, one or more in abundance Then I can gracefully bow out and bid you good riddance Can you strike back like the Empire in Star Wars? Or will you lay down like your mom and the other street whores? TheKnightOfNee I won't just strike back, you see this Jedi's returning Feel the pain of my attack like when Anakin was burning Hi, the high ground is where I'm found, high on this mound You lay below, with the lava's flow (it's slow, like your sound) I really set you ablaze when my raps get ignited I put the crowd in a daze, and they leave delighted Do I need to add more? All your scores will be zeroes Battling you is a bore, instead I'll go watch Heroes ... I'm back, watched an episode where Mohinder was in Delhi And do you see, I can use more tricks than Peter Petrelli Nothing you create can equate my great power Now don't be late. While I wait, I'm paying your mom by the hour Ayvuir Oh Nee your just like the Phantom Menace A stupid idea with a stupid premise So you have the high ground, what of it? I'll come through your anal ring, just like a hobbit You may be ablaze but i'll put you out with water Then fuck your daughter, and feed her like lambs to the slaughter I've fought better rappers than you, so i will get a vote Even if i have to rally just to keep afloat. Watching Heroes makes you instantly a loser Watch Lost, it'll make you a better user Flashbacks and time travel, it'll have you confused And bemused, whilst i'll be sitting here, looking amused. ---- Battle 20: WalrusJump vs. Fetusbucketeer ~The Score~ WalrusJump: 3 Fetusbucketeer: 3 ~The Raps~ WalrusJump Pleased to make your acquaintance, Walrus is my name Now that the greeting's over, up goes my lyrical flame This rap battling game will be one you've lost decisively Spitting death, my words cutting your ass incisively This lyrical castration on a level not seen since Lorena Your junk so full of bullshit we'll just christen you John Cena Faced with sublime perfection, that would give God an erection Dwarfing the fuck that gave Barack the '08 election So really, just give up - there ain't much hope at all for ya With people voting me like I'm kguy playing some mafia You can't stop me, whatever you throw I won't even twitch 'Cause in terms of rap battlin' I'M THE JUGGERNAUT, bitch! Fetusbucketeer Well I guess I have to give it to you - at least you can spell, B But get a buzzcut man - your hair looks worse than Peter Petrelli's Oh hey your mother's a whore - I never beat around a bush Well I beat around hers... uh, until she told me to push But don't you worry I'm not your dad and if I were I'd pay money So you wouldn't lie all alone on the bedroom floor cuz you're hungry Well it's probably time in the rap where I boast about my skills But I'd rather call your mom a whore again so I think that I will - Your mom's a whore, there I said it and I hope it hits home that your mom has sex for money and she's given me dome I'm going now but I want to leave you with a few parting words: Your mom has sex for money and hey, your mom? She's a whore. WalrusJump Pssh, you've never gotten any action 'cept in a wet dream Bet you were shocked when you woke up with pants all full of cream My mother's faithful, and another reason you don't speak true Is that whores willingly go down on anyone but you. I'd say that it's your dick - but then it wouldn't be fair, 'Cause it's kind of bogus to rip on something that really isn't there. You're a charmer like a troll, both figurative and literal And your complete and utter ugliness is rather atypical. So please, don't go braggin' about your bullshit lies It's so pathetic that to be honest it left me surprised So just go on back home, fap or something to let it out 'Cause you really have no right to say what the real stuff's all about. Fetusbucketeer Alright man, I'll always give credit where I see that it's due And you earned some with your last verse 'cause some of what you said - it rings true Like the part about me having little to no genitalia? Yeah man you hit the nail on the head with that one - I just can't compare to ya. When I was four I was saving my mother from a burning Land Rover It was on fire because the man she killed sent assassins to pwn her But they missed, hit the gas tank, and BOOM I'm a eunuch But I don't let it phase me because it's like I have two dicks You look confused so I'll use the rest of my time to explain to ya That what a woman wants in bed is just a guy that'll lick her So when you're getting it on and she's looking out the door Just remember what I said an oh, your mother? A whore. ---- Battle 21: nintendogirl1 vs. ForcefulDragon ~The Score~ nintendogirl1: 10 Forceful Dragon: 2 ~The Raps~ nintendogirl1 My 4x4s full, draggin’, yo’ ass to the ringside, Shoulda been a hearse, but bitch, you are just too wide Mind lingering long on a man of marshmallow, I ain’t crossing my streams, and you’re still fucking eating jello. Put your spoon down and listen, I’ll only tell you the once, You’re facing raps Einstein, you’re the local village dunce. Lie down, accept defeat, I need your submission, You drown, be discrete, save on the physician. ‘Cos battlin’ on gonna get you bloody and scarred, Watching me obliterate’s a study in art, Private your decision? You’re fodder in this division, While my vision shows the crowd provision for precision. Forceful Dragon I'm your lord N liege, your rapping supreme And there's no place for you in EffDee's Regime But I'm a busy man, so we'll keep this brisk And starin me down bitch, you're takin a RISK you're fightin an uphill battle, it's like tryna hold Asia I'm rollin sixes all day and they're sure to phase ya Snake eyes upon snake eyes watchin your chances fade Shoulda never plied this trade and just stuck to gettin laid All I see is cannon fodder when you shoulda sent your best 'Cause my lyrical forces are blessed when the battle most crests You're supposed to be my worthy foe? you're even under dressed for death Your chance of victory now? Even flatter than you're chest. nintendogirl1 You reign supreme? Dude that was a dream, Your regime I deem as stable as cream, And I’m the one whipping, with my snake eyes on you, Hypnotized you do my bidding, while power I accrue. Yes, I went to Asia Minor, what did I find there? Your sausage in Steiner, no finer a diner, Your blessing exposed, your words juxtaposed, As unopposed I disclose, the truth while you doze. And you must be asleep, because those lines were weak, I’d weap if they were, the best that I could reap, So as your soul I collect, I reject to reflect, In retrospect ‘cause all you did was get wrecked. Forceful Dragon To reduce your own shame just heed my advice Give your quit notice now, don't even think twice A continued loss of fame is just too high a price Your wordplay is trash, its not even on par With the stolid crap scrawled upon napkins in bars Your continued existence, to this contest? A mar You're old and washed up, at the end of your rope Don't bother to cope just find a new hope On eskimo terms you'd be stranded to float I've seen raps with more bite been delivered by nuns nuns with no teeth and no strength to gum So quietly retire, bow out cause you're done. ---- Battle 22: SensiShadeSlaye vs. Ed Bellis ~The Score~ SensiShadeSlaye: 0 Ed Bellis: 5 ~The Raps~ SensiShadeSlaye The girls all moan and the guys all sigh Sensi Shade is here to make Bellis cry He’s slick like grease an’ he’s quick like silver Shade Slayer’s voice makes all the girls shiver So-Called King Bellis thinks he’s hot stuff Slap down a couple verses, he’s done ‘nuff After all Shade’s just a flowless white guy The likes of him, Ed don’t even have to try Your mistake Bellis, Shade’s bringing the pain It’s all aboard the motherfucking upset train So happens Shade’s voice is Ed Bellis’s bane I've sung Perish Song Ed, 3 turns remain Ed Bellis You made me cry, that much is true, but it was out of pity I looked for hooks within your rhymes but only found a Smitty Your fate will be decided by this one-man rap committee And I judge your rappin skill is minuscule and itty-bitty I’m Lavos to your Dragon Tank, I’m Smithy to your Mack In terms of teeth I’m Colgate and I’ll brush you off like plaque Your upset train just got derailed and flung right off the track Cause your stocks go down like claimed cops while I’m tradin like a Jack Perish Song is worthless here, King Ed has learned Soundproof Gonna hit ya up with Judgment and you’ll take it like Bidoof While Ed tore down all the houses and set fire to the roof Sensi ran away and hid, cause his raps were just a spoof. SensiShadeSlaye King Bellis has arrived to grace us with his presence He’s come to throw scraps of food to his peasants And by scraps of food I mean scraps of rap His last verse hurt my ears like Spinal Tap I heard something about toothpaste and Bidoof And naked Cyclo dancing around on a hot tin roof …You never actually said that? My mistake, dude I apologize if my mental imagery has gotten you in the mood Though I suppose callin’ attention to yer sexuality is a tad bit rude It’s the only thing I could think of to make you come unglued I’m sure the rapping backlash will cause chaos ensued But I’d expect nothing more then the King of ineptitude Ed Bellis Try to make me come undone? I ain’t made outta horses Try to push me around? Bitch, I’ll show you what force is Wanna challenge the King? You better change all ya courses Right now you’re forgettable, painfully bland Y’all ain’t got the conkers to upset my command I wield eight Master Swords, and you’re just GANNON-BANNED Those rhymes were disgusting and painfully lame This match is a slaughter, ain’t even a game – Our host, he can’t even remember your name This “king of ineptitude” just brought the pain You’ll lose by a million, I do ascertain And they’ll have to rechristen you SensiShadeSlain. ---- Battle 23: Rollthebones vs. RustyMrMokka ~The Score~ Rollthebones: DQ RustyMrMokka: Wins by forfeiture ~The Raps~ RustyMrMokka Let's start this by me Rolling the Bones Gonna get serious when I'm off the phone but we already know that Rusty one this match why am I even doing this might as well get on the patch you lost cause you can't even post but it's an easy win so might as well toast I'm coming for you MOR I'll slam you into a door your gonna feel sore go pick a local whore but this is mostly rushed I get interview and maybe I'll blush ---- Battle 24: Furious J vs. The Beginning ~The Score~ Furious J: 7 The Beginning: 8 ~The Raps~ Furious J Robbed of his first battle by Shaggy's cowardly act Furious ready to rock the stage with the come back Right now is the beginning of the rise of the king With lyrics so bitching, they make a mute man sing You've got no chance of winning, you best take to wing I'm the champion of rapping, only waiting for the ring You may have got a win, against a trivial opponent But in the art of dropping rhymes, I'm the vital component Your words are lies, I'll testify, I'm the only true deponent You gotta know I'm the best in show, I bet it hurts don't it A devastating win assured I'll step back and take a bow And leave your punk ass saying, "Where's my God now?" The Beginning Hey God, it's TB, what the hell did I just witness? You rose Laz'rus from the dead, so please help out J with his disses. Cuz all I see is misses, shots at Shag that are stale. Says he's Best in Show, so make this trained pup wag his tail Lie down like a good boy, toss him a doggy treat Forget the bite, he's got no bark, nothing more than a tweet J's rhymes make the dumb speak, but you Lord cure the blind Next time you heal the talentless, keep Furious J in mind I ask of thee, give me competition for the next round Cuz when it comes to this game, J is lost and will never be found So I pray for my opponent, who's about to get his first loss Could you scooch over Jesus? we need to make room on the cross Furious J You pray to your God, but he must not have been listening Cuz your words are so bad, they could be the titanics christening I'm a born-again atheist after reading your first rap Cuz a belevolent God, would never let you spit that crap You're rhymes are so horrible, they could be a biblical plague I'd rather lose my first born, then watch you on the stage I may be up on the cross, but you're down on your knees Lookin' up at my shit and begging, "Please, J, Please." But I'm not the rapping savior, I won't die for your sins I'll keep rolling up the ladder, keep on chalking up wins You're a rap abomination, with a sloped forehead and fins TheBeginning ends now, and J's reign begins The Beginning What happened to 5 pst? don't you know that you're early? Oh, that's just like you, J, always coming prematurely Maybe you should have waited, read through it one more times Cuz surely you're embarrassed for knighting me "I am Rhymes" Or maybe proclaiming the "belevolence" of an ever-loving God One who allows you to share the stage with TB, don't you find that odd? "Please, J, please" when will you cease this display of mediocrity I'm St. Peter at the gates, I condemn thee and show no pity Turn away from this city! You belong in Sodom and Gemorrah Where you suffer my wrath, isolated from my aura But the time for biblical lines and rhymes are done Spit my name in the past tense, I've only just begun ---- Battle 25: Biolizard vs. Cokes ~The Score~ Biolizard: N/A Cokes: N/A '''NOTE:' Due to Biolizard's resignation and the lack of a proper replacement until the end of Week 2, this match was scored as a Technical Draw. ---- Battle 26: Blur vs. Princess Anri ~The Score~ Xtremeblur: 2 Princess Anri: 2 ~The Raps~ Xtremeblur B'asically I bask in blastin' beginners back '''L'yrically I lash enlightened linguistics you lack 'U'napologetically I unpack unparalleled perfection upon your ass 'R'evolutionary rhymes that request to be rhetorically asked 'O'minously I ooze omniscience on top the opposition 'V'iciously I vocalize verses with valiance and vision 'E'xpressionless emcees entangled by blur enveloping every ear 'R'edefining standards of realness - rap's new renaissance is here 'A'mongst the ancients I assess my fate: Anri's annihilation 'N'otorious since nascence - the nexus of hip-hop's new nation 'R'elaying ridiculous wordplay repeatedly resulting in retreat 'I'f you could please, skim this post vertically to truly understand your defeat Princess Anri 'B'lastin' a beginner, is that what that was? Something almost singed me. 'L'astin' til' dinner ain't gonna happen, cuz. You bring less heat than Shinji. 'U'nrealistic are your chances to survive with your straw hat and shotgun. 'R'aditz says your power level's sub-five. But I'm in awe that it's not one. 'E'ach word that you pick has the same first letter. It's an unbelievable feat! '''A gimmick to make your lame rhymes better, could you have been less discrete? T'his league's better off without you. You want to make yourself useful? '''S'o self destruct like Chiaotzu. Or use your neck to make that noose full. 'D'eicide's what you're waiting for. But showing up was your fatal flaw. '''I decide both your fate and more. I'm going to spare no coup de grace. 'C'humps conjuring contagious conjugation cause collisions catastrophic. 'K'eep your next verse courageous and remember alliteration is idiotic. Xtremeblur And I wonder, when I rap along with you - if everything could ever feel this real forever Faithfully, you stand by me. My girl, my sunshine, so happy together This is more than a feeling, this is an unchained melody, and I'm not gonna miss a thing I don't think the world would understand - not Dion, not Houston, not Vandross - could put the love in their voice that I bring There are many things that I would like to rap to you, but I don't know how Unlike Zelda, you, my princess, will never be excused, so love me tender now I was lost, so I looked, and I found you - will this happen another time? You take my breath away, my own sweet child, and there ain't no mountain I wouldn't climb Because you're just like heaven and I will always love you; you're the only cure I need Ben Folds was wrong - I'll be the luckiest, should your life you choose to spend with me All these verses we made, from the cradle to the grave - This is my final plea. All I want is you. God only knows...Anri, *gets down on one knee* Will you marry me? Princess Anri Yes, yes. A thousand times yes. I'd never take another lover. Now please get me out of this dress and get under the cover. May our honeymoon last until the new Game Contest begins. I'll be the small spoon. Ass ready, willing to accept your sins. This is all happening so quick and I don't even know your name. I hope it's not all just a trick and you really do feel the same. I've never felt this way about anyone. I know it will last forever. How'd you melt my heart at 21? Actually, I'm 22 but whatever. Age makes no difference. I wouldn't care if you were only eight. It'd be a criminal offense. But if I went to jail I know you'd wait. I'd wait for you till the end of time. I'd count the days gone by. Until our marriage is not a crime. Did I mention that I'm a guy? ---- Battle 27: TheLastOblesik vs. WiggumFan267 ~The Score~ TheLastOblesik: 2 WiggumFan267: 1 ~The Raps~ TheLastOblesik Let’s get this ball rolling with the opening rhyme Cause “adios Aeon” is the only Spanish you’ll be hearing this time I can spit in any language to all and their own Leaving AA lost in translation he’s gonna need Rosetta Stone Now it’s time I step in cause I’m the number one instructor I’m so damn fluent I could be a Carnegie conductor Unfortunately my instruction was to no effect Apparently teaching Aeon how to rap was a big regret I apologize for your failure to interpr’it But you’re no guitar hero, hence your lack of frets You can take this loss but please don’t be pissed They call me Schindler but you’re not on my list WiggumFan267 Good morning there Tee-low, time to rise and SHINE! Aeon's left this playground, so now you're all *mine*! You're just Tommy sittin' there at the top of the slide, I'm here to be your Angelica, and knock you out of stride Knock you unconscious, everything's goin' murky, Only halfway done, ladies an' gen'men of the "jerky" I'm your big bully, do I gotta say it thrice? Your shit's so thin, its fuckin' REPTAR ON ICE Put up a fight T-LO cuz yo' rappin's gettin' nailed And I'm just spinnin' about a girl in *pig*tails. We both ain't so sweet though, in which I take my revel, Deep down, I'm pure evil baby; I'm the fuckin' devil. TheLastOblesik That rap was stinkier than Cynthia in the sewer TLO's out to cleanse Wigs no doubt cause I'm purer I don't plan on going down so easily as NORG But my rhyminz sure to keep you more hungry than Thorg Call yourself Angelica? Well it's time to meet rap's Susie Ima take your puddin pops then put you out in a doozy Your rap is so criminal you're a lifetime felon Mine is exploding inside you...ya feelin my melon? Cause at the end of the day you'll be more lost in Paris You'd be dying to concede me so I'll be your Sephiroth, Aeris If you were an AIDS test you'd test positive for losing I'd listen to your reply but I'll put a Gramps and start snoozing WiggumFan267 Well I ain't one ya see to normally be too fickle, but that lousy flow sure produced some rotten Pickles I hadta shower after that; made me feel real skeevy, Gonna nail your big behind, same as Stu does to Didi Now think back, relapse, Thorg loses in the end, The Winn-AR, Rep-TAR, sent Thorg to Washington I'm the one testin your skills: Positive, AIDS and SARS Next time watch where you buy your Fudgy Ding-A-Ling Bars From Phil to the Lil its like my rappin' speed's at twin. You're just a dumb ole TLO-saur and "I don't love him!" The battle's over now man, you're no Susie Carmichael. You've got no way to win, after I steal your tri-cycle. ---- Battle 28: Seginustemple vs. BBallman7 ~The Score~ Seginustemple: 5 BBallman7: 5 ~The Raps~ Seginustemple Look at you, all pumped to have your rep stomped and marred The ball's gettin jumped - I got more hops than a bar With just twelve I'm able to dunk ya under the table The lyric drunk wonder stops at the seg stable Only cables got your b-back, still livin in red pill fables Where you the shit, spit ill, you see more shit than Clark Gable Through rapid eye movement seven stays fixed on fiction, Double six vapid bars later you're proven mixed up in conviction Yeah, you've got sick diction, in that your flow's like a flu I feel ill for putting double bee down in my debut But your career has a shot, unlike your free throw don't miss You should star in Def Jam as a silent protagonist BBallman7 That verse was so weak, that's too bad cuz you need this, I butchered the Walrus, you tied with a fetus, I'm getting five stars from everybody that reads this, Should have bet on this slaughter, cuz then I would be rich. I'm so disappointed, you had so much potential, Like a girl with a nice ass, but face needs some dental, But you ****ed around, like insurance on a rental, And I'll never back down, you can't cure this I'm mental. So don't try to get lucky you're gonna have to go through me But so far it seems you truly don't want to out do me, So excuse me, you call this your debut but you already flopped I just hit the winning shot news said your heart has just stopped. Seginustemple Fatigued yet, sonny? Ready for this Segin set? The league's pulling money and hedgin your 'bet' But like a pet they see you through unease with nerdy hustle Wheezing "please, he's a breeze, just use a lil muscle" So apparent they're errant, your night terrors realized I'll eat ya alive and spit you out til you're nihilized As a Nietzche-derived rolled-up scroll unfurled Ink in arial reads "What's the point of this world?" In a whirlwind of words you've been pinned to the board God of sin here to weigh in, play to win (praise the lord!) Slay the already floored, and reward they who spin Seginus genesis now begins and for you it's already ~fin BBallman7 I'm litterally laughing out loud, because that was pathetic, Your prewritten rap was a bit too generic. Not even one line attacks me like your first, Not even one line seems like you read my verse. But why even bother you lost with a bleeding nose, And you had your last rap written two weeks ago. Back to the battle and your lame innuendos, Seginus genesis, that's clever, I choose Super Nintendo, Seriously Temple, I feel so disgusted, You could have asked me for help and we could have discussed it, This battle could have been epic but you got lazy and rushed it, Now you won't get a vote, I'll be two and oh, **** it. ---- Battle 29: DigitalIncision vs. TVontheRadio ~The Score~ DigitalIncision: 2 TVontheRadio: 3 ~The Raps~ DigitalIncision I just woke up so lets make this quick, TV, you here to suck my dick? 'Cause I'm stuffin' yo mouth like you need to stuff votes To win this battle with ten inches down ya throat But TV, I'ma grace you with a couple DI quotes So you better listen up and take a few notes But I gotta hurry like I said, got my girl waitin' son My rhymes and flow penetratin'like bullets from a gun Have yah even seen a girl, TV, have you had one in ya view? The only time you get propositions is when you play Fable 2 But that's OK if the best you can gets in a game, kinda sad that the men light yeh flame, Now I'm pullin out, sorry 'bout the aim, if anythin' you've just been shamed by fame. TVontheRadio I've been eagerly awaitin' for a chance to get back My rightful spot in this league, the baddest battler in the pack Anticipatin' spoken struggles with the setup by Cokes But all I got from my opponent's shit-suckin' and gay jokes. I ain't stoked with all of your disses, elementary I'll make ya' see reality, just how you can't keep up with me The only mystery to thee will be "Query my sanity!" Exactly how it's meant to be to battle brainlessly with rappin's 'T'ele'V'''isionary Digital is whack to me, analog is where I be The pedagogue of Tagalog, my tongue's hands-on, get down and dirty For precision lyric surgery, I cut yo' lines like Ryougi Ending your very entity, a vicious verbal vivisectomy DigitalIncision Oh hey TV, so nice of you to show I understand you took extra time to best my flow That's cool with me though its sad to see that you came up "short" as us-u-ally Sure my insults came on a bit strong But yo doin' your lyrical surgery all wrong Your scheme is whack and your flows a joke, once again you come up broke took all that time then come out and choke Its like you playin' Trauma Center with no stylus to use Precision takes backseat to raps that confuse This ain't a hospital though I might call nine-one-one Your raps are makin' me sick, as a replacement your done. TVontheRadio The only reason I take time to write retorts profoundly prime The rappin' crime you call your rhyme pollutes with grime this art sublime I have to find a state of mind The kind aligned to crush and grind Your bones I bind, all unaligned Combined - a rambling Frankenstein Which I unwind from space confined The grotesque creature now unmined To plague mankind with raps consigned So hideous they'll make you blind 'Til I decide to shut yo' mouth and end yo' life, ain't worth a dime Maybe you're better off with rappin' as an undead, buried mime ---- Battle 30: ExThaNemesis vs. MaxedOutRyu ~The Score~ ExThaNemesis: 12 MaxedOutRyu: 0 ~The Raps~ ExThaNemesis I got trophies fillin’ my jeans like they bout to burst the seams. And MOR’s winless just like Buffalo sports teams. If he sports dreams of beatin’ me, he’ll have to raise his level. Before I unleash this beast and leave him disheveled… Pantin’ and suckin’ wind harder than dirt devils. He’ll be breathin’ so hard like he just ran 50 yards, Like he does at the special O’s with his fellow retards. People wanna give me slack for holdin’ back, When my weakest crack give Ryu panic attacks?! Here’s some advice, MOR, listen to these hunches. You wanna stand a chance, train hard with some verbal crunches. Coz I just blasted you while pullin’ five or six punches MaxedOutRyu They say i can't do better than my last I'll show 'em, Me and ExTha are in another class It be easy to talk about his ex Like how he failed to provide sex There's even alts dedicated to that *** Why she even ****** with him hell i dont know But fuck that bitch, I have a lyrical itch No more talk about ExTha's bitch 4 more lines, better be lucky the rules ain't sixteen My assault is like a bloody tampon, wont be clean Raging Demon sucka, cant block this Round 2 then I finish this ExThaNemesis I think I’mma make this rap about comparisons. You’re the Mr. Slave to my Mr. Garrison. You’re droppin’ balls while I’m Marvin Harrison. So far apart that it’s just embarrassin’ You’re the game and I’m ertyu, coz I just beated you. In MPC you’re PC-Supes, I just de-feat’d you. You’re a Goomba and I’m Yoshi, I just eated you! I could beat you if my first verse I just repeated, dude. I’m a million degrees and you’re still cool when heated, dude. Takin’ you off your feet with my lyrical de-cleater, dude. So if I’ve beated you and eated you, and in all manners defeated you Do you see any reason for me to still be speakin’ dude? MaxedOutRyu When I have time to this I'm unstoppable Chances of you winning aren't probable I see spur of the rhymes aren't good enough Maxed Out bitch, My lyrics are tough enough Sickly flow, might as well call it the west nile virus Get injected by this then there's no end of hearing this Nobody will mess with ya, you'll become a plague I declare war sucka, ace of spade Next time you come in my city, show some respect Or i'll give you an ass whippin you'll never forget And for the next bitch that has to battle me Hold on a second.........there mom is calling me ---- Battle 31: MajinZidane vs. Swordsman12 ~The Score~ MajinZidane: 4 swordsman12: 4 ~The Raps~ MajinZidane well here come the swords, all ready to go, a vict'ry for you'd be surreal that's fake like a dream, your strikes i can't feel, they'd hurt if i weren't type steel. cos a swordsman you are, just not quite adept, you can try but i'd just 'defend.' my shield's your one 'block,' you're gonna be swept, i'm the 'spurs' and this is your end. maybe you should give up, read my words so you'll known, probably time to seek a replace this hear is my sub, i'm the captain of flow, get some peanuts for you turtle-face. you should raise a few stats, maybe try a tail glow, better yet go with an accupressure this attack you won't dodge, it's one hit KO, bank a three in the clutch like D. Fisher. you might pull ahead, but my shells do not miss, i will knock you right off of this road. they're not even red, you shouldn't've fled, i'm peach and you're my servant toad. i think you're misled, you're looking quite dead, take a rest maybe save in this inn but you'll find you have bled, stuck atop your death bed, with me asking you "oh did I win?" swordsman12 So here’s MZ, the rap battlin’ catastrophe Can’t believe Cokes thought this joke is a match fo’ me Ya rap’s a cheesy poem, flows even worse A free lesson's what I’ll show ‘em, you’ll go home in a hearse One hit KO? Thanks for all the laughter You’re a nerdy bitch on Made: I wanna be a rapper Poor little princess, you’re in the wrong chateau Way outta your league and I’ve yet to reach my plateau No Mario to save you, so bid your adieu Survivors of my massacres are more rare than Mew Your attacks are defective and ya steel ain't protective Cuz the fire that I’m throwin is super effective MajinZidane but your fire is weak, under-leveled and such, it can't phase an elite like me work on your technique, you're still just a pipsqueak, as for now you can't touch MZ. cos i'm quicker than sheik, with moves you can't touch, gonna knock you straight off of this map like a rogue i will sneak, my "flow is unique," this "princess" you will not kidnap. i reign over you, my words are your law, i'm a king while you're my lowly minion. my people rejoice, hold me dearly in awe, while your no more than a palmer opinion. i won't be outplayed, you'll require first-aid, got a gun while you're tryin' kung fu. your words are low-grade, your attacks i evade, turnip spam and i'm finished with you. i'm on top of the world, got the strength of an ox, you're as strong as a girl's beanie baby. my wit is supreme, like a snide dr. cox, you're the lions draftin' Michael Crabtree. i won't stop when you're down, 'til the ref pulls me back, keep on punching you square in the face your words are off track, i will cut you no slack, a HADOKEN to keep ya in place. swordsman12 Hurt ya feelings the first time, with this one I’ll end ya Cursed to spit worse rhymes, “unique flow” can’t defend ya See ya lip quiver, the blood ain’t menstrual little lass River flowin’ down ya leg cause I just kiterunner’d your ass Sheik or peach take ya pick cause it doesn’t mean shit to me I’m like fox at FD, it’s a guaranteed victory Waveshine to a spike, down is your trajectory 3-stock you quick, deliver a top tier valedictory Head of the class, in my Prime like Optimus You’ve been surpassed, this match was total dominance This ain’t football, but you’re right that I’m a lion King of the jungle, in this fight is where you’re dyin’ ---- Battle 32: Swif7y vs. sonicblastpunch ~The Score~ Swif7y: 12 sonicblastpunch: 16 ~The Raps~ Swif7y i'm swift surely and damn this kid's dirty, he hits girlies. the champs around and I'm takin this hands down like 6:30. sendin quotables after you to provide the voters a laugh or two. cause droppin nice bars is my most notable attribute. and in this verse for you i'm not usin techs or gats. cause this is personal, i'll hurt you with direct attacks. let's address the facts: spb like to keep a dick in his throat. guess that's why he's always ahead and swift to get votes. don't like the clashing right? you more like the fashion type. listenin to flashing lights, dancin with hermaphrodites. swif7 hits you with massive might, propel you to drastic heights. atmospheric gases strike, rapidly your ass ignites. sonicblastpunch just who the hell is ''spb, how are you failin this abjectly three letter abbreviation and you place two incorrectly are you dyslexic or apoplectic in yer impotence yer stanzas simply fallin limply at my wall of eloquence against my force of rhymed discourse with verses rollin awesomely you scrape along the bottom like a thorough colonoscopy so grab that tactless sack of crap you prattled off to vent yer mind and hang it in yer family tree where it can feel amongst its kind and ask yer parents while you're there about yer birth certificate scrawled swif7y in crayon with spittle spots all over it they knew you're inbred and deformed like charles second the hapsburg so you're named gibberish garbage like a random keygen password Swif7y alright fuck it, i'll sit you in my passenger seat with your feet up. nuts tied to the dashboard, smile at you while i speed up. settle in around 80 miles per, word, this next bit is morbid. i'll hit the breaks, cause whiplash and watch you bust your nuts with your forehead. then force you to do jumpin jacks with your elbows tied to grenade pins. after ive taped open your eyelids wide to watch pornos with just shaved men. breaking your face in with a hateful parade of punches from satan's brigade. i'm not a polite guy... see, i'm taking you out and making you pay. you fake what you say, heathen. i got the keys, the locksmith was shocked. votin for me or sbp? that'll be a brief debate like "boxers or not?" you wanna compare my flow to yours, try pissin against the niagra. cause i actually keep my shit hard, you just pack your rectum with viagra. sonicblastpunch it's sad how my opponent flaunts his sexual disturbance, he stores hairless man porn in his car in case of an emergency and spends the day dreamin about the ways he could ride with my nuts i'm flattered, really, but yer desperation only undercuts the shameful lack of cultivation that yer stammerin releases schlongs and cars and punches are yer only conversation pieces a tragic admission that you can't aspire to somethin finer openin yer mouth wide for my balls to be yer headliner and this continuous suckin has rendered you bitter and unstable folks callin you nas because you've lost and you want on my label but take solace in the knowledge that you left the way you came marked out of one hundred points you matched the seven in yer name See Also * Week 1 * Week 2 * Week 3 * Week 4 * Week 5 * Postseason * Back to the Standings and Results page Category: Board 8 RAP BATTLE